Tuesday, January 18, 2011

The One Constant in my Life - Weight Loss

If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people. – Jim Eason

When I was pregnant, I ate healthier than I’ve ever eaten in my entire life – and amazingly, it was easy! Knowing that the development of that little life was totally dependent on what I put (or didn’t put) into my body made passing up the Twinkies and choosing the banana a no-brainer. Sure, I slipped up every once in awhile, and during the final month of my pregnancy I may have had a McDonald’s chocolate milkshake every single day…but then I’d come home and have salmon, brown rice and green beans for dinner.


I gained 29 pounds with Busy, and within two weeks after delivering her I’d lost all but five of those pounds. In the next few weeks I lost those last five pounds, then five more, and even a few more. Unfortunately, my eating habits quickly returned to pre-pregnancy mode once I stopped exclusively breastfeeding, and those extra pounds I lost somehow got packed back on.

Before I got pregnant I was trying to lose weight, mostly to get my body ready for pregnancy, but also because I was heavier than I’d ever been. While I was also happier than I’d ever been, I was tired of the extra weight and wanted it gone. Now that I have a child, I want it gone more than ever, mainly because I want to be able to keep up with her when she’s an active toddler (and beyond). My secret reason, though, is this – when summer rolls around Busy will be nearing one year of age, which is the perfect time to start swimming lessons with some Mommy & Me swim time. I LOVE to swim, and have always loved it. However, I avoid pools like the plague, because I am so incredibly embarrassed to be seen in a swimsuit.

I’ve felt this way since high school, which is ridiculous because I look back now and I looked great in high school (I’ve always had curves, but back then they were good curves, not fat rolls). I have always looked forward to the day that I could take my kids swimming, and there is no way I’m going to ruin this chance to enjoy the pool with my first born because I’m mortified to be seen in a swim suit.

Because I now have a goal in mind, I am a woman on a mission. I have a pantry and refrigerator full of healthy food (not to mention two freezers in the garage – seriously), a lunchbox filled with veggies, fruits, and lean proteins at my desk, and a water bottle ready and waiting.

I WILL LOSE WEIGHT.

The healthy way, so it stays off and does not come back. I’m putting it up here on my blog so that I will be held accountable to you, Blog Land, and so that I can share my journey with anyone who chooses to read it. In order to be sure I keep it up, I will state my starting weight, keep track of what I’ve lost, and hopefully reach my goal weight with the world watching.

So here goes. I weigh….

Nope, I can’t do it. I can’t share the number. I know numbers on a scale don’t mean anything in the real world, but really they do. I know you won’t judge me Blog Land, but it’s too scary. Let’s just say, it’s a big number. Real big. Three big numbers, actually, which add up to a prime number.

Maybe someday, when I’ve lost the weight, I’ll share it with you. Maybe that’ll motivate others. But for now I’m keeping it to myself!

Now, I have to get back to munching on my green beans while trying not to think about Twinkies. Wish me luck!

2 comments:

  1. You're so brave for naming it, for saying it out loud. I know we all have different things that we struggle with, but there's something admirable about declaring a goal. I find that it is, for me, a great way to be accountable, too. I use my blog like that for running. You are so beautiful exactly as you are, but I totally understand the sentiment about wanting to be better for your kids.

    I'm so glad you're writing again. I so enjoy reading your blog. You have a great voice as a writer.

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  2. I really, truly think you can do it. You are lucky to be married to someone who is a great example of what can be accomplished with diet and exercise.

    You told me that you want EJ to take after me (i.e. skinny), but I think it would be better if she took after her future parents (i.e. healthy). She'll benefit more from your hard work than my dumb luck.

    Now just stay the hell away from Starbucks and get busy!

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