Over the last few, well, years, I've gotten to be quite the shopaholic. This isn't exactly something that I'm proud of, as I've put myself in debt that I should have avoided. Last month I made a commitment to not purchase anything that wasn't routine or absolutely necessary - no frills. I did okay, although I bought an awful lot of Starbucks, and I did a little bit of thrill shopping here and there. I did much better, however, than I have in a long time.
This month, I reinforced my commitment to no-frills shopping. So far, I'm actually doing really good (yes, I realize it is only the 5th), and the positive balance in my bank account is a strong motivating factor to not buy crap.
However, there is something about shopping that I just LOVE. No, that I NEED.
Shopping truly is my hobby.
I was at Starbucks tonight - I know what you're going to say...but in the interest of budgeting, I put a set amount on my Starbucks card this month and when it's gone, I'm done - and I had left the house where I'm dog-sitting specifically for Starbucks, and that was it. However, I got into my car and felt this incredible need to just go somewhere. I was racking my brain, trying to think of things I might need to buy, or stores I might need to visit: Target? No, don't need anything. Ross? No, can't buy a new purse or clothes. Raleys? Nope, don't even need any groceries. Dang.
I don't know what it is about shopping, but I really do feel a pull when I'm out and about near stores. It's like, I have money, and money is buying power, which means I have the power to choose what I want to buy. And that equates to plain old power, and I like power. I'm drawn to power. I love power.
Can it be that I've just had an epiphany?
I shop not because I need things, or even because I desire things, but for the pure joy of the shopping experience itself? The power of choosing something, of pulling out that cash, credit or debit card, and saying "Damn right, I can afford this and I choose to buy this."
Of course, I usually get home and realize, No I can't really afford it, and I definitely should not have chosen to buy it...